Several years ago now, mid-2000s, I came upon the career and calling called Life Coaching. I was clearly in midlife at the time and so desperate for something new and inspiring.
As a Christian woman, I saw how adding in Christian values could make the coaching process so much more successful for anyone being coached. I was ecstatic that I'd finally found 'my thing'. And so I paid the tuition to enrol in the training, went through extensive coaching for myself, carried out required probono work to become certified, and then coached many clients across North America by telephone.
But my midlife angst wasn't satisfied. In between clients, there was nothing to do. So I went out and found a job in an office--something I'd done before leaving the workforce to raise my children.
I had always promised myself to return to the workforce. I missed it. Prior to having children, I could think of no other life. But finding my way back was hard. I applied to umpteen jobs, which of course meant umpteen rejections. I had several interviews, and was smacked in the face at what I hoped to hide but couldn't--that I'd been out of the workforce for at least 10 years by then.
Ageism is real. I was in my mid-forties. One employer rudely joked that my experience was 10-years old. But he offered me the position anyway--for low pay--lower than the minimum wage here in Canada, and I took it.
And I saw how in a mere 10-years things had changed. I'd stayed updated on Microsoft products and my typing speed was still very high, but it was the way business was done that was disappointing. No one talked to each other. People dressed casually--something I didn't know how to do. And most employees kept their offices paperless.
Added to these changes, I was expected to learn a complicated accounting system, answer incoming calls, draft legal documents, and make outgoing accounts receivable calls. All for $10 an hour - a third of what I was paid before leaving the workforce.
For a short time, I had new self-esteem. I can't pinpoint why exactly apart from getting a paycheck finally and getting out of the house. But my hours were within the children's school day hours and they'd never see me leave for work or come home. Neither would my husband, so even my own family didn't cheer me on as I'd hoped.
I wanted to make it work and took notebooks home to try to understand the complex system. But I suffered with stress headaches and felt confused. And then I quit.
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| Art Doodle by Rosalie Garde |
Once I returned to the homefront, when I couldn't obtain another part-time job, I took on several work-from-home jobs and volunteer roles, and finally became a freelance writer--a dream I had since in my twenties.
And for what I might do with my coach training and ministry focus, it made sense to combine my love of writing with life coaching. But I would not coach clients one-on-one, instead, I would make and sell self-coaching tools--ebooks, if you will, where a woman could prompt herself, go on her own journey, gain insight, and grow out of her rut.
Life Coaching is a tool many women
use today to gain
direction, support, and accountability,
so they can move forward.
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| Art table, Rosalie Garde |
And then I had an epiphany about midlife in my late 40s. I was in a long period of perimenopause and all its challenges. I became severely depressed, isolated, lonely, and lacking stimulation. I googled the term 'midlife crisis' and my eyes were opened. But I saw a glaring gap in writings for Christian women facing a midlife crisis. Sometimes, knowing Jesus is not enough!
I desperately wanted answers for how to get out of my rut and wanted a Christian point of view.
God knew about my struggles but I needed more help. I finally was brave enough to tell my family doctor I was depressed. And with the medication she prescribed required I sign on with a mental health therapist.
Part of my epiphany was that perhaps many of the women I had coached had been in a midlife crisis too. And, for me, putting a label on the problem helped.
So, with more research and revelation, I wrote a self-coaching tool with them in mind.
16 Essential Steps to Help You Walk Through Your Midlife Crisis: A Self-Coaching Tool for Midlife Christian Women (Self-Coaching Tools for Midlife Christian Women Book
16 Essential Steps to Help You Walk Through Your Midlife Crisis: A Self-Coaching Tool for Midlife Christian Women (Self-Coaching Tools for Midlife Christian Women Book
Fast Forward
I started this blog way back then too but eventually grew bored especially once I moved beyond midlife.
From 2021 until recently, I was involved in another special project. It was engrossing and exciting. The work was confidential so I can't share about it. And now that project is being put to rest, and here I am again wondering about my next step. 
I haven't quite heard from God about the full plan of what I'll do now that I'm semi-retired from my work-from-home projects, but I have decided to put my former blog posts into draft with the intention that I'll write fresh posts or rewrite those I still agree with.
The first old post I decided to review had this list of possible topics that I may cover going forward.
- Enjoying the Present and Finding Purpose
- Thriving as a Stay-at-Home Mom or Homemaker
- Seasons of a Woman's Life
- From Motherhood to Menopause
- Managing Wellness
- Mid-Life Challenges
- Moving Forward on Dreams and Goals
- Removing the Clutter from your Mind or Even Your Home
- Strongholds, Wrong Beliefs, and God's Input
I hope you will join with me on this next phase of my journey whether you're in midlife, having a midlife crisis, having a great life you want to tweak, or if you are now beyond the midlife age as I am.
I have a lot to write about!
